THE BOX The story repeats itself again and again... Look at their faces! Staring into the hole, frozen in expressions of grief, painted with tears. The hole grows darker with the coming of the rain, the wind stops screaming, finally. Feet covered in mud and filth drag a mass of faces bathed in tears towards their final destination, around the hole they gather. The box is ready, nailed shut so the loved one doesn’t come back, ever! One more is finished, the man in the black robes sings, as the rain starts to rage down from the black sky, soaking them all with cold water. Child stands by the box, fearing that the one inside will jump up. The man in black robes sings away, chasing the soul further on to unknown path to us, another one is done, another is done! Ropes start to screech around the box, as it splashes onto the mud. Earth is banging on the box, the drum, marking the final ending. We all throw it in, just a little piece, so will someone to us, onto our box, as the story repeats itself again and again... BOXED Tight space squeezes my shoulders, I feel the board above my eyes. Thumps shake this prison of mine, dim sounds fill in trough the boards surrounding. Muted voices come from somewhere outside, so unclear, reaching for my ears from the dark. I cannot move, not even breathe. I start to choke, than wake up outside the box, then find myself inside it again. It stopped moving. The dark song begins to play. First verse, The hammer and the nails trough the box tune. Second verse, muted song of a man from somewhere outside, unrecognizable words and melodies, cry out somewhere, announcing the end soon. Third verse, powerful thumping and banging just in front of my face, as the earth takes the box into it’s eternal embrace. Not long passes, I realize I’m dead, in utter silence, boxed forever. DREAMLESS SLEEP Now I lie motionless trapped in the prison of eternity. Empty space without light, There is no breath, there is no feeling, there is no thought! Just an empty void of endless nothing, surrounding, grasping and filling already nothing. I wait for dead sleep, the eternity without waking, emptiness that will cleanse all painful thoughts, all the things I cannot escape from, all the ones I cannot kill and forget. Imagine the curse of remembering all you gave a lifetime to forget and never think again! I seek the void of nothingness, just to devour everything that is eating me and consume me whole, until there’s not even a thought of existance left, as the dreamless sleep puts you out of existence in the nights it comes. FACELESS WOMAN A thing in white hovers over the whites of eternity, she’s a faceless woman. Standing over her table endlessly buried in her thoughts, leaned over her poisonous herbs. Living creatures run across the table, until they’re caught in her gaze, and when they are, she rips them to tiny shreads. She doesn’t feel the cold surrounding, nor the thread that rips trough the heart and freezes the soul. Not even the heat from the mortal sun, she has no passion, no heart. She’ll reach the height once long ago tomorrow, when she wakes from the immortal dream. Killing, she’s just killing. She feels the smell of fresh blood flowing in a river, just waiting for the moment to jump and tare apart the victim. Feeling great, cos she cannot die, she’s just again and again under our skin. Playing in games of someone’s other fate spilling blood and licking it off the floor, a wild beast in face of a faceless woman, uncatchable by eyes, unreachable, but just behind our back, waiting for the right moment. With poisonous words she kills the spirit, kills the patience and flashes painful images of the past you tried to forget. She bleeds you slowly, her time is endless. Empty room is her playground, her private paradise, empty thoughts are the poison. Futile hopes is her illness that cures very hard, emptiness is her dream. A MOMENT OF WEAKNESS Forgive me for saying too much, of something I never wanted to tell, For seeing me flooded with tears and uncovering much more from what I ever intended of showing to you. Sometimes I lose control, I am just a human. All of my strength burns in an instant, and so, forgive me for seeing me like this, weak and flooded with tears. Forgive me for giving you the false hope, or destroying something that didn’t deserve to be destroyed, in the moment of weakness, my greatest weakness. THE BIRTH I feel it all at once! The beggining, supreme height of it and always the painful end... All before it even begins! I watch that light in silence, starting to tingle in vast darkness of future that comes. I feel it’s warmth, I watch it grow. I feel it’s enormous strength that keeps me warm and slumbers me in the fullness of perfect feels. The small light becomes more and more, as it closes in to it’s birth becomes an enormous fireball that burns out everything that is touched by it’s light, secretly within itself, mastering it’s end, the smiling end, a death of a star. The end defeats already dying star, and everything becomes black again, all about to begin again. The beginnig, supreme heights of it, the end and destruction, the creation in the darkness all in the same moment even before it begins! IMPULSE LOVE I watch you write yourselves down on white screen, mechanical friendship gives you a hand in impulse love... writes your names. Just blank words trying to describe the feel of human closeness and a keyboard to provide the touch, to replace the irriplaceable. Gentle hands, with plastic keys to replace the palms. I watch you hiding behind the words of someone else’s soul I see you’re isolated and alone I see you drown it all in drugs and booze but it just blunts the pain for a short while, hitting you in the face in full counsciousness. Everything becomes electronic, carrying the new divinity, bearing the new time and thought, but still you hide behind the typed words and captured images of the impulse love. DELAYING THE END Life is pumped trough the glass tubes, stuck in many cracks of my broken, rotten body, keeping my life for a little while delaying the inevitable end. Neon lights shine above my once clear eyes, making the illusion of the real sky, giving artificial consort, giving the light. Mechanical apparatus just pushes a breath in me, synthetic fluids give this corpse a life just delaying the inevitable. My consciousness is partially awake, soaked in painkillers to keep the screaming pain away from the eyes; I’m alone tied to the machine, just delaying the inevitable, just engineering the end. DIRTY DECAY Poisoned world drowns in fumes, concrete and steel are the new body of the earth, black smoke and vapours of our technology- dried and burned of every natural life. Empty river beds remind me of life that once flowed trough them, naked hills still whisper the hum of countless leaves, an echoe of long dead forests that held the earth with their mighty feet. I stand in my closed cube, eyes pointed at ceiling remembering how it once was, how life was free, alive and independant of mechanical devices, synthetic masks and fluids. I try to look trough the charred dirty window, and see nothing but decay. My soul greefs with every drop of acid rain that is slowly eating the concrete, my eyes soak in tears trough the mist of vapours, as I yearn to see the clear blue skies. I just watch in isolated silence, just mourning, just touching the world trough the thick glass window. INSIDE When I close my eyes, I see nothing but darkness. My own dark visions of even darker future haunt me every day, with no ending in site. No ending to come, no resolvement of this knot tying to even more complex pattern, every time I think of a new reason of why to exist. ANGRY Reflections of inner worlds turn my mind into rage hate and anger are all I need now, an order within to create chaos outside, and destroy.... .... Feed off the imperfections non of my own conceal my weakness and suffer the burden of someone else’s mistakes, suffer the ignorance and chaos it creates. Darkness in me stares back pulsating and driving me to madness, they all used me... But the wheel of eternity keeps spinning, my time will come! THE EDGE OF HATRED Chain my mind to emptiness of routine life, tie myself to nothingness of nothing within the blasted routine. I want to rule my world!!!! Lick the blood from the burning wounds swallow handfull of nails when the pain finally stops just to call it back again! LIVE AND DIE AGAIN AND LIVE AND DIE AGAIN AND DIE AND LIVE AGAIN AND LIVE AND DIE AGAIN!!!!!!!!! RIP MY DREAMS APPART will you? TURN ME INTO SOMETHING I CANNOT BE if you can, I’ll be rather dead. FORCE ME DEEPER INTO HATE if you dare! I’LL REMEMBER IT ALL I’LL REMEMBER IT ALL and when the moment comes it’ll be there I SWEAR!!!!!!!!! HIT ME AGAIN AND AGAIN DO IT!!!!!! STANDBY PEACEFULLY AND WATCH ME FALL DOWN I know you can THE TIME WILL COME TO REPENT ON ALL YOU DID TIME WILL COME FOR SURE IT WILL!!!! I DARE YOU OUT WITH EVERYTHING I’VE GOT NOTHING TO LOSE BUT MY LIFE IF I DON’T LIVE UP TO MY PURPOSE I DON’T DESERVE TO EXIST!!!!! LAUGH AT ME AND PROVOKE turn it into weakness for your killing rampage DON’T BELEIVE ME, I’M CALLED A FOOL you will know one day INSULT, ATTACK AND PUSH ME DOWN I’ll peacefully swallow, I’ll stand it without a word I will just swallow, but so shall you, so shall you.
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